Lucky me we aren't quite there yet, Bentley is only seven months old. I know he is capable of understanding a lot of things I just don't think discipline is one of them nor does he do anything purposely wrong. Ryan and I are not for or against any type of loving discipline I think that every child is different and requires a different response to their behavior. Some might need a spanking were as others might just need a look. I guess we will find out what Bentley needs in months to come. (I'm really praying that a word or two does the trick, it makes me sad just thinking about spanking his cute little bottom!!)
We started "disciplining" Lewis when he started crawling because he was touching everything in sight! We would explain to him (and still do) which things around the house were a "no touch" and would give him a little flick if he kept touching it. The fire place/my plants are both good examples of things we didn't want him touching or getting into. Consistency (+ grace and love) and good communication are key to good discipline, weather you are spanking or giving time outs. So many people think that its not important to explain things to babies because they can't understand but I have found that our little guy understands so much more than I think! Now, at 14 months, I say "no touch Lewis" when he is about to touch an electrical outlet or something similarly dangerous and he immediately stops in his tracks. On the rare occasion that he does continue to touch something we tell him he is going to get a "consequence" (flick) and that's that. It definitely takes more effort on the part of the parents but I think its well worth it!
So this is pretty broad question because it really depends on the kid and the situation. But like both Leah and Tara have mentioned, consistency is probably one of the most important things no matter what kind of consequences you choose to use. Starting young is definitely key as well because it teaches them that there are boundaries from the very beginning. For our oldest (she is almost 4), we use natural consequences (for example if she thows a toy, she will loose it) and we also spank her. We use spankings mostly when she defies something we have asked her to do/don't do (for example, if I ask her to please not bang on the wall and then she contiues to do it, she will get a spanking). It gets harder and harder as they are older to be consistent because I feel like the areas are not so black and white. There are a lot of gray areas and I tend to be more lenient and my husband more strict. We try to talk about different situations and come up with a game plan ahead of time with how we are going to deal with something that is an issue (like whining) that way we are on the same page. Also when we are going into a situation that she has had hard time obeying in in the past, I try to talk to her about it beforehand. For example,the other day we were driving to meet a friend to go walking on a little trail and I told her that when I asked her stop running that she needed to stay in that spot until I told her she could keep going (her and her friend run ahead and she has a harder time listening when her friend is disobeying as well). So we talked about it ahead of time and I told her that even if her friend disobeyed her mom that she didn't need to worry about that and just to worry about herself. Talking about it before worked great and her friend even obeyed better because she saw my daughter obeying. Another thing we do is help her pray after we discpline her (to ask for forgiveness or to help her change her attitude, ect). So anyways this is just a little bit about how we handle disobedience from our daughter. One important thing to keep in mind is that the goal is to teach little ones through discipline instead of simply punishing them for a bad choice they made!
Great post! It's helpful to hear about what other moms are doing as we are on the cusp of W being old enough to discipline. Thanks for sharing!
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